OT

poor you

Poor MOTORPSYCHO!

hahahahaha...so you're the lucky ones then.Great.It's always nice to know one has friends when he thought he had not.

cut and shave the next time dudes if you spit om my shit.

this happened last nite in my superboring hometown. you might have heard about it:

[url]http://www.spiegel.de/international/zeitgeist/0,1518,603542,00.html[/url]

this guy's a true motorpsycho!

Car accidents are no fun dude.Especially when it involves any type of drugs or alcohol.What if he had drove into your house dude, killing your little innocent girl...would you have posted it then?.I bet not.And if you did you wouldn't called him a motorpsycho but a causer of your hell.If you want to be funny...try to be funny..not stupid.

And never drink and drive.

nobody got killed,so shut up!

IT'S FUNNY TO ME that as soon as I decided not to write about psychonauts, the only ideas I had for articles were about psychonauts. It's sort of like when you tell yourself that you're "definitely not going to drink tonight" and then you end up polishing off a twelver before 10:00 pm. Or is that just me? Anyway, I went to a concert the other day and noticed a lot of younger dudes looking around with sort of a terrified look in their eyes. Like they had no idea what they were supposed to be doing. And it kind of made me sad. So I thought I'd put together this handy little list of do's and don'ts so that you guys can be all calm and collected at the next concert you go to. You can thank me later.

DO'S

IF YOU SEE a professional psychonaut (or a totally awesome and recognizable amateur) trying to find a quiet corner to sit down in so he can relax for a second, definitely make a point to go sit down right next to him and start asking him about anything having to do with psychonaut stardom. Be sure to sit no farther than six inches away from him.

IF ONE OF THE psychonauts has been making numerous attempts at a really difficult solo and they finally end the jam that they've been working towards, then you should probably turn to your friend and tell them that you've already seen that particular solo performed by a local psychonaut who has no official music sponsorship deals.

IF YOU NOTICE that the band has their own ice chest with beer or waters or shit like that in it, then definitely hover around it with a glazed look in your eyes. If nobody offers you anything to drink just help yourself. Trust me, they brought enough for everybody. It's sort of like their jobs.

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY (seriously, this is important), go up to every one of the featured band members and give them free shit. Ask for the LP's they're listening Ask for their shirt. Ask for their bandanas or headbands or spikey bracelets. Whatever they have, try to get it. If they seem unresponsive then don't feel bad. You can always talk shit about them on the internet as soon as you get home.

where´s the "don´ts"?
I´m all lost without them

Shit man, I thought you'd never ask.

DONT'S

DON'T FORGET to use an extra helping of hair gel the day of the gig. You're going to want your bleached tips to be as spikey as they possibly can be. And don't forget to wear that MP shirt you got at the mall. You know, the yellow Beefy-T with the big ass logo on the front.

DON'T ASK any of the band for an autograph unless you are willing to have the autograph placed either on your forehead, your mom's tits, or your sister's bra. If you're asking them to sign your shirt then it's mandatory that the shirt you are asking them to sign is not a shirt that is manufactured by the company that is organizing the concert.

DON'T TRY TO MAKE BUDDIES with the visiting band by offering them any of the following: drugs, booze, pool parties at your parent's house since they're in Aspen, sexual healing, music LP"S beyond their wildest dreams. No wait--actually, do do this. No wait, I was trying to be sarcastic I'm confused now. Basically just bug the shit out of the dudes. Be sure to blow cigarette smoke in their faces while you're talking to them.

DON'T SIT IN YOUR CAR in the parking lot smoking weed unless you have a bumping ass system that's loud enough so that everybody at the gig can hear you blasting that Iron Maiden CD your cousin left in your ride. Also, when you leave the parking lot, don't just casually drive away.You're gonna want to bust a smoky burnout to the maximum.

AND IF THE gig ends with any sort of product toss, don't stand idly by and let some other fucker catch that stuff. You're going to want to be willing to lose some teeth over a 20 euro price point CD. If you come out of that pit blood free, I'm seriously going to be disappointed with you.

SO that should pretty much get you up and running. Oh, one more thing. If you have a really shitty marijuana leaf tattoo on your arm, then you should probably tip the sleeves off of your shirt so that everybody can see it. But that's kind of a no brainer, huh? Good luck, dudes. Wait, one more thing: be sure to wear some silver necklaces.

Spain is a great country.It's like a bunch of beautiful old people.Very friendly too.In fact, my sinfull youth escape to this warm country turned out to be a 2 year fully sponsord on the beach sunbathing girls gazing boulevard DC skating dream.Free shopping everyday!!!!! Free food!!! Fuck everything was for free in spain and it didn;t stopped right there.....next thing i knew i was fully sponsord on this plain to Madrid for a 2 hour interview on the tele.As i came back everyone who didn't knew me before recognized me now as their new fame toy.I mean come on spain is like the country where once you made it...you made it.You don't have to prove anything anymore....you can just sit back and enjoy the superstooge life once you have it.

Carajo.....k bueno!!!!

hahahahahaa....wait 'till you hear my riffs guys.....heads explode dudes......fuck yeah.....

England is unlike Spain a Monster....this city scares the hell out of me.It's just to big and to crowded and like there is too much of everything there and above all stands the ridiculous expensive prices.It's like you pay a pound a step and you're broke at the end of the street.Better then the big city is the small villages round there....Beccles...Lowstoft...It is here where i met Fran Beck........a genius....i mean this guy is like the real artist man.This guy does the whole art thing and then his girlfriend Louise...makes stained glass with roaches and all kinds of awesome sutff.....but fran ....he is the designer of the GOLDEN GODS ..hahahahahahahah....i have seen LEMMY with a golden god in a mag....as i was asking what LEMMY was holding in his hands he just said....the same as you hold in your hands right now as i picked a GOLDEN GOD from his table.Fran.....you are awesome........what an artist!!!!!
I found myself baking breakfast in for the whole Terry motorcycle crew.......hhahahaha..

ye ye......

United by Faith!!!!!!!

Someone died for me ??????? Plan B then !!!!!! Like in Judas be my guide.
Gosh...i wonder what Bruce would say.I guess he must be proud guys........!!!!!

Everytime!!!!!!!

BTW ,there is no doubt about B.E.!!!!!!!! Let's see who's tired waiting first, i hope it is not me.Because i just wonderd who climbed wich mountain and when did who walked with J.???

Ready??? Keeping the underground lit!!!!!

How to be the Psychonaut that everybody loves.

YOU KNOW THE KID as soon as he arrives everybody at the gig sort of sighs .The kid who can play the craziest fucking solo in the world and the only person that's not going to be clapping is the dude from out of space. You know the kid I'm talking I'm about, right? He's at every gig. Hardrock, Ballads, Jazz,Festivals, Clubs. It doesn't matter one bit. Guaranteed that kid is going to be there. And guaranteed his dad has a mustache. Wait, that's a different article. I'm saving that for my Gig Dads expose.

1. DO A LITTLE BIT OF RESEARCH into current Psychonaut fashion trends. See what's hot. And then try to follow that style but be sure to fuck it up a bunch. Try wearing a humongous T-shirt with some little-ass jeans. Wear a denim vest and some mesh shorts. Basically just try to look as much like a superstooge as possible.

2. IF YOU'RE YOUNG ENOUGH to have to wear a helmet, make sure it's about two sizes too large. I'm not sure why this is so important, but it's definitely a necessity. While you're buying your big-ass helmet make sure to purchase some matching wristbands. Wear them on your forearms for Christ's sake.

3. THIS IS SUPER OBVIOUS but when you see somebody improvising a jam that you know you can do, make absolutely sure to show them you know how to play that riff. Go up right behind them and when they stop, play your little riff and play off as if you have no idea what a piece of shit you are.

4. IF YOU'RE SHY, you better get over that social inhibition.Because you're going to need to talk nonstop as soon as you get to the stage. Try to find the people that seem the most uninterested in what you have to say. Target those fuckers. Give them a run down of all the lyrics you wrote the last time you were at a stage. If they don't want to hear about that, just tell them about the time you almost got sponsored.

5. IF YOU'RE GOING TO PLAY the main stage, make sure you work out some sort of Psychonaut routine that lasts at least two to three hours. I would recommend a healthy dose of rock to hardrock combinations. These can be done in increments of 10 songs that lead up to orange marmelade set. Repeat as necessary.

6. HYGIENE: If you're not old enough to grow pimples then just skip to number seven. But if you are old enough to grow pimples then it's a must that you wash your face with cooked hamburger patties. I know I'm being kind of mean with this one, but I just call that shits like I sees it.

7. MAKE SURE YOUR DIET consists solely of food that can be purchased at a gig. Nachos, hot dogs, cheese flavored snacks, beef, fruit punch Gatorade, etc. If you follow this strict diet then when you sweat you'll smell exactly like goat shit. I'm serious. Don't underestimate the link between scent and hatred.

8. WHEN YOU play a riff make sure everybody saw what happened. If you aren't sure that everybody saw what you did, then clap for yourself or give yourself a rap inspired shout out. If anybody in the near vicinity has any type of camera, be sure to ask them if they "got that shit." You know what, fuck it, you should probably just write "I Fucking Rule" on your guitar with a paint pen.

9. IF YOU'RE REALLY GOING to be that psychonaut at the gig that everybody loves then it's a must that you never learn how to actually play guitar.Only pretend how to play. Because there's a dude at the gig that everybody loves also and I'm pretty sure somewhere in The Bible it says you two shall meet.

10. FIGURE OUT what the wackest, most bullshit bull·shit corporate company in Psychonautland is and be completely 100-percent all about it. Guitars, amplifiers, pedals, painos, T-shirt, shorts, hats--the whole fucking deal. If you're old enough (or know somebody with a bottle of India ink and a sewing kit) then you should definitely get their logo tattooed on your forearm. Because you're definitely going to want to look at that thing in your 40s and think, "God damn, I'm still a total Superstooge."


Note: This has absolutely nothing to do with the above article, but when I was thinking of ideas for this column 1 was considering doing a fashion forecast type of article and I was thinking it would be really funny if dudes quit wearing women's jeans and started wearing women's shorts. Imagine how fucking crazy that shit would look with the poofy marshmallowy shoes that dudes are wearing these days. That shit would be so fantastic.

Anonymous User Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>and when did who walked with J.???

Not sure when, but I bet Spacemen 3 walked with him!

ye ye.........lol.

Motorpsycho turns heads in 2010 ? Or should it be The Dreaming Celestial ???

Everytime!!!!!!!

So one fool let to one other let to another other let to chloe(e) with the tatood tie .Blood enough on the tables.Everyone is going hungry, let's break some bread.Fear and worries about nothing.Looks like someone did a good job?

hahahah....i was kinda dissapointed to see only 3 fools 'cause i thought there was a dozen of them.Maybe it was just the vodka fooling me.Big surprise.

I learned a long ago never to wrestle with a pig.You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.

Not that any of y''all is a pig.Far from it.I could make fun with everyone showing up to be the psychonaut of the year.But back to the quote.It's hard to argue with assholes without becoming a little bit of one yourself.You're better off just walking away.There are a lot of problems with message board style criticism but the biggest are that it is anonymous and has little value besides being inflammatory or in my case getting violent to turn the comments aside......sorry thomas.People only check to see if someone is talking shit and when you are writing under the name psychonaut player supersonic yerk off, what motovation do you have to hold back? And even though it is anonymous i always get the feeling that the people writing the worst stuff are not the average MP-fans from around the world but the bitter members of the psychonaut community.The disses are way to personal and way too informed.It is more like the slacking pott-head psychonaut from the forum talks shit on the superstooge who shunned him, the guy at the record shop dogs his bro who got sponsored and moved to Norway and the roadie insults the band member who was mean to him in the tour van.What almost all comments have in common is the fact that they are totally worthless aside from torturing people.

Let us see if any of us can beat the odds and show the rest of the world what it is really all about: Make love..make fun..make music.

Sail on....psychonauts.

Thanks for the apology, Mark. Accepted. I'm sorry too. It's not often I turn into an intolerant arsehole, and even those few times are way too many.

Indeed, there is a downside to this internet-bashing. Not only the poster is anonymous, all the people who read that poster's posts are anonymous, even the people who seem to be operating under their own name.

In my case, on my Facebook or Hyves or MySpace you can read that I work in a bookstore. That profession has some clear nerdy connotations and therefore some people assume I am only a booky nerd. The truth is far more compicated than that. Do not assume that somebody working in a bookstore is automatically someone who is easily walked over, non-aggressive and a softie in general. These assumptions are dangerous and, if you provoke the wrong person, can potentially get very ugly indeed.

Like I heard someone say: "To assume makes an ASS out of U and ME."

You are right. It is best to walk away and not be bothered by it. One of the fun things about this internet is that everybody can disagree vocally, it just gets annoying when it becomes a shouting match full of expletives. That is not disagreeing, that is being intolerant.

Like Mony Python said: "That is not an argument, that is the automatic gainsaying of everything the other person says."

I like it when I disagree with someone, be it on the internet or otherwise. It is a chance to learn some new ideas and expand your own worldview. Not that I seek out arguments intentionally, and I am certainly not a quarreling person, but when people make good points and have something to back those points up, it can get very interesting.

Like The Strokes said: "We're not enemies, we just disagree."

Now let's get back to the mutual appreciation society, and this pig back to his job. Keep on posting whatever the hell you want, everybody!

Greetings,

Thomas



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/08/2009 04:29PM by TvdR.

hahahah lol.....yous got its rights!!!!!

LLM
MMS
Kill S.D
T-door
Greener
Drug t
fool's gold
-------
V.S.

Or something like that.

It was all surfing the vortex yesterday.Very Hard.Sometimes i feel like i could explode.It's like the burning of the midnight lamp at the same time staring at the sun.But i guess i am not the type of person for giving in or giving up instead i'd just rather take another load and carry another ounce of pain.But shit yeah.....sometimes it is just my past that gets to me.And it's is then that i get the fear and start running around, stressing, smoking, pulling skin off.Very sad.Especially when i find none to blame but myself for anyone's mistakes.Kinda strange but o so true.So where do i find my comfort if it's not in the drugs...booze..swearing....fighting....i could pray all day but that doesn't work either.Best to do is just forget the whole thing for a while and focus on other things in life.

good to see toy back on board thomas!!!!!!!!